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May 18, 2010

CONSENSUS WATCH - 5/18/2010

An ongoing series dedicated to vigorously monitoring emerging threats to The Consensus that global warming is real, caused by humans, and must be addressed at all costs.

Because without Consensus, the public would be permitted to entertain competing hypotheses.

It has been an eventful couple of months since our last Consensus Watch report:

Demonstrating a personal commitment to preserving ecologically sensitive acreage, Al Gore spent $9 million of his own money to purchase a 1.5 acre parcel of land believed to be home to many endangered species, including the green-bellied full-time gardener and the white-gloved live-in maid.

Gore Preservation Efforts

Penn State climatologist,
and one of the creators of the famous “hockey stick” historical temperature chart (so-named due to the fact that it was made up) Michael Mann, demonstrated his allegiance to open inquiry and the natural affinity for freedom of expression so beloved by scientists the world over by threatening one of his critics with a financially ruinous lawsuit.

It was revealed that a critically important 147-year New Zealand historical temperature record had been subjected to numerous adjustments to create a warming trend where the actual data had indicated none had existed before. It remains unclear as to when the scientist involved in the data manipulation will be awarded his hard-earned Nobel Prize.

In order to buttress its credibility and address criticism that it had used science that had not been properly peer-reviewed or had been the product of parties with vested interests at stake, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) has decided to institute a process by which such science will only be used if it sounds good.

Recent developments prove without a shadow of a doubt that if you choose to use data that demonstrates that the past 12 months were the hottest 12-month period on record while ignoring the rest, you can say things like “the past 12 months were the hottest 12-month period on record.”

Take that, climate skeptics.

And in other news, arctic sea ice is growing, sea levels are not rising, and there is a real possibility we are facing decades of cooling temperatures and shorter growing seasons, increasing the risk of deaths from starvation.

Which is precisely why it is so important that scientists across America have stood up for The Consensus and let their voices be heard despite the relentless assault it has been under from new data.   Whether it’s an expert in Mayan Civilization, earthquake risk management, or testing theoretical models for the structure and evolution of collapsing protostellar clouds, they pretty much have all the most relevant fields of climate science covered, including experts in Photoshopping pictures intended to elicit an emotional response.

Not True But Dramatic Awww.

We don’t know about you, but we’re ready to add $9 trillion in energy costs to the economy for no discernible change in CO2 emissions!

J.

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May 18, 2010 at 04:26 PM in Global Warming with CONSENSUS WATCH | Permalink

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