January 30, 2012
2012 Washington DC Auto Show
We take a break from our day-job-imposed semi hiatus for our annual report from the Washington DC Auto Show.
As we have reported for several years now, the organizers of The Washington Auto Show have been attempting to lend the event more of a Washington flavor, the better to reflect the unique culture of our nation’s capital. In furtherance of this goal, they decided to reorganize the way you enter the hall. In prior years, when you entered the Washington Convention Center from the Mt. Vernon Square Metro, you simply hung an immediate right. This year patrons are directed to go straight down a long hallway and then turn right.
And then turn right again.
And then turn right again. Careful readers with a natural affinity for spatial relations (and a high resistance to nodding off into boredom-induced comas) will note that you end up in the exact same place, just in a more complicated and circuitous route to no obvious purpose.
Welcome to Washington! Our customs may appear strange at first, but it's just our way.
We did note that along this new route a bag-screening room had been set up, as apparently organizers got wind from Pakistani intelligence that there was a plot brewing to disrupt our nation’s attempt to wean itself off imported oil, perhaps by blowing up a Honda Fit EV.
We did not have a great deal of time to spend at the auto show this year, partly because of the half mile we had to walk just to purchase tickets, but here are some of the things we saw.
Ford is in the process of trying to revive the Lincoln brand and restore it to its former glory when every red-blooded American dreamed of one day being rich enough to park his vehicle in the living room.
Likewise, Chrysler is turning to the storied “Dodge Dart” moniker in an attempt to combine the muscle car heritage of Mopar with the design acumen of Kia.
If you’re a Fiat marketing rep trying to convince Americans that the 500 isn’t a ridiculously tiny toy-like car unfit for American highways, you know what probably isn’t a good idea? Providing interested customers the chance to drive a Fiat 500 in what for all the world looks like a carnival bumper car ride.
“Weeeee!! Look, mommy, it’s just like driving a real car!”
Car makers love to show off “concept cars” at auto shows, not that they’ll ever get built, but to serve as “engineering platforms” to develop technologies that will one day make it into production vehicles. Take this futuristic entry from Ford for example.
We’re pretty sure that that innovative wax job might just make it onto a Ford Focus some day.
The Washington Auto Show is, as always, a good time, and runs through this coming weekend. Just be sure to bring your running shoes and maybe do a little cross training ahead of time if you're planning on entering from the Mt. Vernon Square Metro side.
January 16, 2012
Semi-Hiatus Update, January 2012
First, I want to dispel the ugly rumor that I shirked my blogging duties by going on a week-long bender in Key West. That is a vicious lie spread by my opponents.
It was only three days.
That said, real life obligations (specifically, the real-life obligation that helps to keep food on the table at Casa Moron) continues to rudely intrude on my free time. Under normal circumstances I would simply shut down for a few months and save you the trouble of checking back here periodically, however it's an election year so I plan to continue blogging, it will just be on an extremely sporadic schedule. With any luck, I will be back up to my normal schedule by spring, just in time for the real mudslinging to start.
January 02, 2012
Key West 2012
Yes, it's the same time, same day, and same drink. It is, however, an entirely different airport.
I think it's good to take a walk on the wild side from time to time.
January 01, 2012
Weekend in Pictures – Holiday 2011 Edition
The Question is, Did They Use Snow Krab or Blue Krab?
You know what I really hate? Imitation krab meat. If you’re going to make krab dip, use real krab, not the fake stuff.
When You Think About it, They Already Kind of Walk Like Zombies
Like a scene out of a preschool version of the Walking Dead, we came across this Apocalyptic vista the morning of New Years Eve. What could possible have driven these youngsters to abandon their peddle cars and flee in such disorder?
We’re thinking cooties outbreak.
Bad Business Plan
In a world where having a job is a right, we suppose it makes sense to sell kids a carnival with two workers and only one customer. But that's just for pretend, after all. Right?
Atkins Would be Proud
What’s a perfect side dish for a sausage and egg burrito? Sausage, of course. (In hindsight, I should have gotten eggs, too. And scrapple)
In rural Pennsylvania, you have a variety of choices in bottled tea, no matter whether you like it sweetened, or really sweetened.
Happy New Year, everyone. I’ll be back… soon.