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April 22, 2014

Addressing First World Problems Since 1970

Do you know what today is?

If you are like most Planet Moron readers, you’re probably thinking, “Tuesday, why? Did I miss a parole hearing? That’s not until Thursday.”

Also, “Wait, it’s Earth Day, isn’t it?”

Exactly.  And to better help readers reacquaint themselves with this decades-long tradition, we’ve prepared a little Q&A:

Q: What is Earth Day all about?

A: Its primary purpose is to raise awareness about environmental concerns that threaten our well being.

Q: You mean, the one-third of the world’s population that cooks and keeps warm burning twigs and dung, 4.3 million of which died in 2012 from the deadly fumes and resultant air pollution?

A: What? No. Threatens us. Not someone else. 

Q: What threatens us?

A: Way too many lights on at night.

Q: That’s a threat?

A: Absolutely. It’s called light pollution. That is why we should all pitch in to help and keep lights off at night for the next week.

Q: You know who’s a big proponent of keeping the lights off at night?

A: Al Gore?

Q: Close. Kim Jong Un.

North-korea-lights-space-01_76991_990x742

A: An Earth Day champion if there ever was one!

Q: Now, what about those millions of people dying every year from air pollution?

A: Hey, they can pitch in too. They can put out their smoldering piles of twigs and dung at night.

Q: Won’t they go cold and hungry?

A: Sure, but think of the brilliant night sky view they'll have! 

J.

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April 22, 2014 at 04:36 PM in Current Affairs | Permalink

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Comments

Hah. You almost tricked me into checking here regularly again.

Posted by: Michael | May 6, 2014 10:53:25 AM

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